***After this post, I won't be posting on here for awhile until if/when we do another IVF cycle. I will continue posting on my other blog at Tammy's Journey. Please join me there! Thanks!***
Our doctor called today and the first thing he said was "This is a disaster". Of course, that wasn't what I needed to hear and the tears just flowed. He said this is very uncommon and, although he has seen it before, I am the first this year and he sees a lot of patients. He was very, very compassionate and apologized several times for not "being there for me" (he was out of town last week).
Basically because of the sperm situation....that I don't wish to go into detail here....chances are there is a problem with my eggs. I have to undergo some genetic testing that I won't know the results about for about a month. If we do decide to do IVF again, the soonest we would be able to do it would be January.
ICSI (where they insert the sperm directly into the egg) probably wouldn't have helped. I probably would've had more fertilize, but the fact that they didn't divide means there is something seriously wrong. We will be checking on the sperm, but most likely it's me.
The fact that I responded so well to the meds, had a good number of eggs retrieved and a good number of mature ones (9), leads more to the fact that there was something wrong with my eggs where only 4 fertilize but won't go anywhere. Based on stats, more than 4 should've fertilized anyway.
This could explain why some months I felt something happen but it was a BFN. It could be fertilizing, but not going anywhere beyond that. I always felt there was a reason...just didn't want to hear this.
Why us? Why did we have to get this road block?
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3 comments:
Tammy - I am so sorry to hear your news. I've been thinking about you all day and was so glad to see that you posted. I know it must be hard to hear this news, but it sounds like your doctor is working closely with you to try and figure out what's going on. It may take a little longer to do that, but at least he's actively engaged in helping you.
I think that all you can do at times like this is to pray, pray to understand what to do next. It is hard to accept this journey and the obstacles that come along with it, and this is indeed a big one.
I hope that you are able to move forward, and I know that you will be. You are in my thoughts and prayers. I hope you will keep us posted as to what's going on with you so that we can continue to keep you in our prayers.
Take very good care of yourself.
l.l.
I wish I had an answer for you. I'm so sorry.
I hope whatever is not working is "fixable" and very, very easily.
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